Looking Glass
by plazmah
Summary: A young girl at the Jedi Academy has a great darkness within her. Will Jaina be safe from it? unfinished
1. Duel and Consequenes

Hey hey hey! Hope you enjoy reading this fic as much as I enjoyed writing it! I had a Star Wars fic a while ago called 'Return to Darkness' but it was too long and I didn't have an ending(hee hee) so I chopped it into two separate stories instead. This is thesecond part. Since I never finished the original story, the first part of this fic is old and the second part is new. As usual I don't own any SW characters, DUH! Please R/R! Thank you. ~exit stage left~ 

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Looking Glass

The two opponents circled each other warily, lightsabers ignited. Cirsee was exhausted, but she wouldn't give in. She couldn't let Jaina win this duel. The girl was proud as it was, she didn't need an additional ego boost. 

Maybe Jaina didn't even need to win to get the ego boost. Already she was smiling smugly in triumph. _She knows she's winning and is gloating in my face._ thought Cirsee. 

Cirsee glanced at the spectators. Anakin Solo and Tahiri sat next to each other on a large rock. Leaning against a tree was Jacen Solo. Zekk and Tenel Ka stood on either side of him. Fortunately Natalya wasn't there. The Jedi Master would not be pleased to see her pupil involved in such a heated battle. 

_Yes. This **is** a battle. Not simply a little practice match anymore._ Cirsee wanted so badly to wipe that haughty grin off Jaina's face. She had to realize she wasn't the greatest creature in the galaxy. She needed some serious humbling. And Cirsee was the girl to give it to her. 

Cirsee's strength returned with a sudden surge of anger and she quickly sprang at Jaina, launching a flurry of attacks. Both fought fiercely, but Jaina swiftly blocked all of Cirsee's attacks. Then Jaina began to counter- attack with swift, fluid motions. Cirsee wouldn't let her get the advantage so easily. She struck down her blade, then when Jaine moved to parry, Cirsee feinted and cut low. But Jaina easily blocked the stroke and moved to strike herself. Cirsee counterparried, letting the impact direct her blade towards Jaina's throat. A spark of triumph crossed Cirsee's face as she saw the surprise on Jaina's face. The move had been agressive and unexpected. But that small spark of triumph quickly disappeared as her concentration split into two. One part of her was still battling, the other was registering the shocked feelings she was getting from the spectators. She noticed the disappointment on Tahiri's face, and immediately felt guilty. 

By the time she felt the rock at her heel it was too late. She tumbled to the ground, off balance. Jaina came forwards and stared down at Cirsee. Then she extinguished her blade and offered a hand to Cirsee. 

"Nice try." Jaina said. "But next time try to be aware of your surroundings, okay?" 

Cirsee scowled. "I don't need tips from you." 

Jaina frowned. "Alright. Sorry kid." 

"**Don't** call me kid." Cirsee muttered indignantly. Just because she was only ten years old... _I'm quite mature for my age. And she knows that._

Jaina acted puzzled at this hostility, but Cirsee knew better. It was all just an act. Cirsee **hated** it when Jaina played innocent. Jaina fooled everyone into thinking she was the ideal Jedi, but really, all Jaina cared about was Jaina. Cirsee knew it. 

But hate was the dark side of the Force. And Cirsee tried to pull away, but it was becoming increasingly harder. Taking a deep breath Cirsee looked up at Jaina repentantly. "I'm sorry. I just got caught in the heat of battle. I'll never do it again." Her excuse sounded weak and Cirsee caught Tahiri's frown. 

But Jaina accepted it with a sickening smile. The tension melted. Jacen was all smiles and jokes. Zekk and Tenel chatted with Anakin. But Cirsee was still trying to stifle her simmering anger. 

_It's a blessing that my one strength is masking my thoughts, feelings and general presence in the Force._Cirsee thought. Without it the other Jedi apprentices would have surely noticed the darkness within her long ago. There was only one person who knew, her Jedi Master. Cirsee wanted nothing more in the world than to make Master Natalya proud. There had been few chances for her to make anyone proud so far in her short life. The slums of Corellia were no place for sentimental bonding moments. As an orphan you had to be street wise and tough or else you would be eaten alive. The whole galaxy was pretty much like that anyways. You could never take anyone at face value. If you did, you would be either betrayed, used or abused. 

"Come on Cirsee. Let's head back for dinner." called Tahiri, shaking Cirsee out of her reverie. Everyone was already a few yards ahead of her and Tahiri had stayed behind to get her. 

"Oh. Yeah. Okay." Cirsee mumbled, and ran faster to catch up with the girl and the rest of the Jedi apprentices. 

* * * * *

"You wished to speak to me, Master?" 

"Indeed I did. Come, take a seat." 

Madoka Natalya sat down and faced Luke Skywalker. She knew what he wanted to talk to her about. 

"This is about Cirsee, isn't it?" she asked, letting the sadness creep into her voice. 

Luke's eyes mirrored her sadness. "I'm afraid so. She told you about the lightsaber practice today?" 

"Yes." Madoka's became suddenly upset. "I'm so sorry Master. I should have told you earlier. I thought I could handle her myself. I'm not strong or wise enough to train her properly. Maybe someone with more experience should take over." 

"I will have no self-deprecation from you Madoka. You're better than that." Luke replied calmly. "You and Cirsee have bonded in a way that cannot be broken. I can see that now. Separating her from you would only cause more problems. But I am sad that you didn't come to me for guidance when your pupil was so difficult for you to train. If my students didn't come to me for guidance, I'd be out of a job." 

Madoka smiled slightly at the small joke, despite its inaccuracy. 

"Remember, even Obi-Wan Kenobi believed he could train Anakin Skywalker. He was a wise and good Jedi, but even he was headstrong in his determination to be a good Master." Luke explained. "You have nothing to be ashamed of by asking for help." 

"I realize that now Master Skywalker." Madoka said bravely. "I hope you forgive me for this error in judgement. Then we can discuss how to go about the training of my pupil" 

Luke was pleased at her response. "Of course I forgive you. Now," Luke sat back in his chair, "we must discuss Cirsee. Jaina is beside herself with worry. She nor her friends cannot make sense of Cirsee's behaviour." 

Madoka almost said she was sorry again, but felt that it was not what Master Skywalker wanted to hear. So she took a deep breath and told him all she knew. Cirsee's upbringing (or lack thereof), her life as an orphan, how she adjusted to the Academy, her training (rife with sporadic bursts of anger), her inclination to hang around older students, her abrasive attitude towards Jaina since the Solos had arrived for a visit on Yavin 4 a few days ago, her complete trust in her Master. 

Most of this Luke had already deduced himself. But it was good to get Madoka's perspective on things. She was a very competant young woman who's only failing was her tendency to sell herself short. Luke nodded and listened attentively as Madoka went on. 

"It's been getting worse over the last few weeks." Madoka mused. "I don't understand why she's fixated on Jaina like this. She was always a little too quick when judging a person's character but this is something beyond simple annoyance. There's one thing she hasn't told me yet about her past on Corellia and I'm sure that's the answer." 

"I see." 

"I've tried to get her to talk to me about why exactly she ha- doesn't like Jaina. But her view of Jaina is so warped it's beyond me. Lately it seems as if she views the world through some kind of..." 

Luke leaned forwards curiously. "Some kind of what?" 

Madoka was pensive. "As is she views the world through some kind of twisted dark side looking glass." she whispered. 

"I don't like the sound of that." Luke replied after a moment. 

"Neither do I Master Skywalker." 

"Whatever the case, we must face this head on." Luke made a decision. "She may be young, but I must have a serious conversation before she hurts Jaina, or anyone else." 

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So, whaddya think? Am I bad or what?? Did I get the personalities right??? Anyways, R/R! 


	2. Past Injustices

Hey there everybody. I'm going ahead with this story, thanks for the many reviews! Glad everyone enjoys the new characters. You'll learn more about Cirsee in this one. Like always, don't sue me for using Star Wars characters pleeeeze! I don't own a single one. Thanks again and R/R! 

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Looking Glass: Part 2

Madoka's plain brown Jedi robe swished around her ankles. Although many Jedi Knights across the galaxy tended to keep their dressing habits the same after becoming Jedi Knights, Madoka felt a certain sense of ease and peace when wearing the traditional Jedi robe. The soft material flowed around her as she paced back and forth outside the Massassi Temple. Where was Cirsee? They always met here just after sunrise to do some meditation. But the sun had been rising steadily for at least half an hour now, with no sight of her apprentice. 

The young woman stretched out her sense and searched for Cirsee. She thought she felt the girl's presence for a moment, but as quickly as it had appeared her presence disappeared. 

_Typical._ Madoka thought with a mixture of pride and worry. _She's shielding herself again._

Thinking back to Skywalker's words, she hoped Cirsee wasn't getting into any trouble. It was so unlike Cirsee. It was true that the girl was emotional and passionate. mistrustful of strangers and pessimistic, but she had never been one to provoke others on purpose, as she had been doing to Jaina over the last few days. 

Yesterday, Madoka had gone to talk to Cirsee. But as she had neared her apprentice's quarters, Cirsee had burst out and rushed down the hallway with her lightsaber gripped in hand. Face flushed, she exclaimed that she was going to practice with Tahiri, as the girls usually did. But Tahiri implied other companions as well, most notably Jaina Solo. 

_Why is she doing this?_ wondered Madoka with puzzlement. From the moment Cirsee had laid eyes on Jaina she had felt nothing but anger and resentment for her. But Madoka couldn't figure out why. Despite Cirsee's less than perfect childhood, there was nothing that suggested a reason for this behaviour. 

_Maybe there's something I'm missing._ Madoka decided to once again go over everything Cirsee had told her. 

* * * * *

Born to a widowed mother in the underbelly of a Corellian slum. Life from the start had been harsh for Cirsee. There was little food, the poor excuse for a house that she stayed in was far below living standards and there was violence everywhere. Cirsee's mother would leave the house at the crack of dawn to work at a hazardous factory, all for barely enough credits to raise the family that consisted of Cirsee, her mother and her older sister Japhia. Many days, as their mother toiled in the factory making parts for turbolifts, Cirsee and her teenage sister would cower in a dark corner of their house, the sound of blaster fire from opposing warlord gangs screaming in the streets. 

But Cirsee struggled on. Apart from her ability to mask her presence (which she learned later) she was also an unnaturally strong child. She tackled jobs that a normal child her age would have failed at. She once picked up a steel shelf and placed it upright with ease when she was only two years old, much to the surprise of her protective mother and sister. 

But one night her life took a turn for the worse. Cirsee's mother took her daughters to an old yet kind doctor who worked out of an abandoned office building. On the way back night had fallen, meaning the streets had become more dangerous. Unfamiliar sounds echoed through the alleyways as the woman and her children scurried homewards. 

Suddenly they were surrounded by a pack of men brandishing vibro-blades. Mocking jeers on their scarred faces, they circled the vunerable trio. 

The mother's face was full of fear, but also determination. She passed the anxious Cirsee from her arms to Japhia's. "Japhia. Take Cirsee and run home. I'll take care of these thugs." 

Japhia knew her mother could not possibly take care of the thugs all by herself, but was old enough to understand the sacrifice she was making for her children. She held Cirsee close and ran, never looking behind her. Tears streaked down her face without her knowing it and her long brown hair flew about as she sprinted through the filth ridden streets. When at last they stood in front of their ramshackle house, Japhia put Cirsee down and looked the child in the eye. 

"Cirsee. I'm going to find mother and bring her back." Japhia explained, pulling a small blaster out of her pocket. "I want you to go inside and wait till we come back. Okay?" 

"You'll come back with momma?" 

"Yes." 

"Promise?" 

"Promise." 

The promise was never kept. 

* * * * *

Madoka sighed at the injustice of the world. Little Cirsee had waited in vain for four days for her sister and mother to return, sitting quietly in her room without food or water. One of the kinder neighbours had found Cirsee and tried to tell her what had happened, but the information was too much for a small child. Cirsee had ran away and stumbled into a group of child thieves, who eventually became her pseudo-family. 

That was when she had started to perfect Force techniques. Other thieves would watch Cirsee walk past store clerks and steal money underneath their noses. That was evidence enough of her ability to hide her presence and image. Agile and clever, she befriended older kids who held her in high esteem as a thief. And if she ever did end up in a fight with someone older than her, her superior strength in the Force made up for her age. 

Somewhere along the lines, she had realized that the Force flowed within her, and made steps so that she could somehow get the the Jedi Academy. One day Master Skywalker had stepped outside the temple to see a beaten up cargo ship drop off an eight year old girl in tattered clothing and a triumphant grin on her face. And so Cirsee had arrived. 

Madoka thought over the the information and realized there was something strange about the way Cirsee had told her about her past. When she told the part about being left at the house, waiting for her mother and sister, her expression became highly unemotional and she shielded her feelings and thoughts from Madoka a bit. 

_I'm going to ask her about that._ Madoka thought with resolve. She knew Master Skywalker would approve. 

"Master Natalya!" Cirsee walked into view with Luke Skywalker trailing behind her. "Sorry I'm late, but Master Skywalker was teaching me a technique to increase my ability to sense other people's thoughts and feelings." 

Madoka smiled. "It's okay Cirsee. Were you successful in learning the technique?" 

"I think so." Cirsee glanced questioningly at Skywalker. 

"She did. She's a fast learner, your apprentice. She picked it up in no time." he replied. _I thought that increasing her ability to sense what other people feel might increase her empathy for people, something which she could work on._ Skywalker told this to Madoka and Madoka only. 

Madoka smiled sadly at the comment. She was aware of how self-centered Cirsee could be. But what would you expect from a child who had to fend for herself for the last five years? Still, Cirsee's lack of empathy had been one area Madoka trained Cirsee tirelessly in. It was what she partly used the meditation time for. Getting Cirsee to sense the forest life around her, the animals and the plant life, the Jedi trainees and the Jedi Knights, it helped the girl undestand other people. 

_If she only understood that Jaina meant her no harm..._

"Cirsee. Do you mind if we talk to you for a moment?" Skywalker asked. 

The girl's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "This is about Jaina, right?" 

Skywalker was calm. "Yes, it is." 

Cirsee scowled. "You don't know her! You're her uncle and you're blinded by it. I'm the only one who knows how horrible she is! I can't believe how everyone else can't see it!" 

Madoka suddenly caught something from Cirsee's mind that confused her. "What about your sister?" 

Cirsee froze. Her eyes widened with so much anger that Madoka took a step backwards. 

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Cirsee screamed. The air seemed alive with electricity. Without another word Cirsee turned and ran into the jungles, tears streaming down her face. 

TO BE CONTINUED... 

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So, whaddya think? How'd you like dem apples :) I'm not quite if I've got a good idea here, but the next chapter should have quite the revelation. Please R/R! 


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